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June 03 2017

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I really need help. I basically discovered that Italian surgeons are kind of inexperienced when it comes to trans surgeries, and I got very scared. Getting my surgery in Finland would have three great pros, which are: 

  1. I would be sure my surgery would come out well
  2. My parents do not support my transition, so by going to Finland (where my gf and her family live), I would be in a healthy, supportive environment as I recover
  3. Time. Waiting lists are endless here in Italy (I had to wait 6 months just to get referred to a gender therapist) and I’m struggling with depression, anxiety, BPD and an unsupportive family on top of it all, I really need this surgery as quickly as possible. 

The only con to all these great pros is the cost. Not being a Finnish citizen, I would have to go private, and private surgeries can cost up to 5000 euros. I’m gonna move to England to study soon (obviously asking for a student loan), and I’m very broke, I don’t have a job and my parents won’t pay for my surgery.

If all my followers donated 5 euros I would cover this sum already, so if you have anything to spare pls think about this. I really need this surgery. I really do.  

Even signal boosting once, twice, three times, four times, would help me immensely. 

I have a sideblog and a YouTube channel where I will try and document my transition. 

Thank you sm, stay brave, 

Casper 👻🌸 


Reblog if you think sign language should be taught as a language in schools.


I’m increasingly Hard-Of-Hearing and learning ASL back when I still had high neuroplasticity would have saved my ass some serious trouble.

May 31 2017

Dear teen girls,











Stop abusing your boyfriends and yes what you are doing is abuse.


  • Yelling at him in front of his friends 
  • Hitting or slapping him when he does or says something you don’t like
  • Telling him he doesn’t have a choice when it comes to decisions that involve both of you 
  • Telling him he can’t hang out with friends because you don’t like him
  • Telling him to not talk to other girls even if they are his friend
  • Forcing him to spend every moment with you 
  • Belittling him and pointing out all his flaws
  • Calling him stupid or making fun of him for making a mistake
  • Threatening to break up with him if he doesn’t do what you want
  • Being emotionally manipulative and crying until he does what you want
  • Accusing him of cheating every time he’s not with you
  • Blow up is phone if he doesn’t text you every five minutes 
  • Telling him you are the must thing that has ever happened to him and no one else will love
  • Physically attacking him when ever you are mad
  • Forcing him to have sex despite that fact that he said he didn’t want to
  • Invading his privacy by going through his phone
  • Getting mad at him for changing his password and demanding he tell you what it is

If a guy did any of these things to a girl it would be considered abuse but since its the other way around its considered normal. Throughout High school I saw many girl treating their boyfriends like shit. Sometime even physically abusing them in the hallways and no one trying to stop it because its a girl attacking a boy. 

Boys: If your girlfriend does anything on this list leave her. It is abuse and you deserve better.

Girls: if you find your self doing anything on this list to your boyfriend you need to knock it off because you are being abusive. 


My brother was abused by his babies mom and it started like this and escalated to child abuse and neglect.

You don’t deserve to be screamed at, ignored, or assaulted.

Not showing affection when she wants or not hugging her before class) or missing a phone call doesn’t warrant getting cussed out or hit.

Lol, I lost 5 followers from reblogging this. That’s fine, y'all can go

Whole lot of grown women do this too.

Just wanna throw these in too

  • Being passive aggressive with him when he wants to spend time with friends or doing other things 
  • controlling when he’s able to go out with friends
  • Breaking up his friendships with other girls just because you’re insecure
  • Making him feel like his opinions in decisions that affect the both of you are irrelevant and don’t matter
  • testing him in anyway in general without his knowledge or permission (example: catfishing! it’s manipulative and weird don’t fucking do that)
  • taking money/credit cards without permission to spend on things without his knowledge ( had an ex friend do this constantly to her boyfriend and she’d always condone it because “he’ll get over it” )
  • guilting him for hanging out with friends/family over you  and making him choose between you and friends/family
  • telling him “you don’t love me if you *insert harmless activity he wants to do here* “
  • being rude or mean to him in front of others to assert dominance or power over him
  • downloading apps to spy on his phone activity (yes, this is a thing “”regular”” people do) or snooping on his social media to see who he’s talking to
  • hitting him, slapping him, punching him, shoving him. literally how do people not understand slapping your male partner is bad. people tend to find this funny in media and society and its weird. KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF YOUR PARTNER WITHOUT PERMISSION. 

I come from a family of very forward and manipulative women and i see it in media all the time. it’s fucked and people need to not be accepting of young girls acting like snot-nosed, abusive shit heads that think they can get away with manipulation and cruelty because they happen to be girls.


if you have an abusive teen or young adult gf right now fellas, leave. don’t let her use you to get her shit right. you’ll be so fucked up by the time she gets it together if she ever does and believe that most likely she won’t.  

Can i just add that ive seen young queer girls do this to their girlfriends. Girls can be abusers and you are right to leave. 

Women/young girls can definitely be just as abusive. I knew a young man that got ran over and had his leg broken by his girlfriend because (in her words he annoyed her) He refused to press charges. Another young lady started to hit her ex boyfriend because he wouldn’t take her back because of the abuse. He called the cops on her and they literally started laughing at him because she was very petite in comparison to him. Anyone can be abusive and I wish more people understood that.

dammit I’d spam my blog if i reblog this more than once but dude this is really important.

Oh my god. This is so important.

May 30 2017





someone wrote a post about forgetting to take their medication which reminded me to take mine
whenever I mention medication people end up commenting saying ive reminded them

so this is a friendly reminder for us to take our medications

thank you

thank you! I had forgotten to take mine too!

Thank you!

May 13 2017

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The minute the marks start appearing on his body he knows exactly what is happening. He watched the same thing happen to his Grandad days before his death. He watched as his parents tirelessly tried to reason with the witch, as they fruitlessly searched for counter spells to no avail. After the funeral his mother sat him and his brother down to explain the curse that was placed on the men of the Hale family centuries prior. They told him not to worry, that the curse only reared its head every century or so, but he could see their apprehension as they looked between him and his brother. 

So when the black marks start to appear he doesn’t waste time looking for a cure. And he knows, he knows how much this is going to kill Stiles, how much Stiles loves him. So he decides to make it easier and break his heart before the witch can take Derek away from him. Because if Stiles hates him then maybe it wont hurt so bad when he finds out that Derek is dead. 

Stiles stares at the disconnected phone for what seems like hours, body numb as his mind struggles to catch up to exactly what just happened. When it finally does, he sees red. He doesn’t remember the drive to the loft but the last thing he expects to see when he gets there is a demonic looking witch practically sucking the life out of his boyfriend Derek. Needless to say, Stiles and his spark certainly have something to say about that. 

May 10 2017

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these puppies believe in you, and you should too






Carrie Fisher’s my patron saint now. Patron Saint of addicts, mood disorders, and loud women. I just decided. I’m gonna build another shrine.

I second this motion. Canonize Space Mom.

Our Lady of Growing Old Disgracefully

“It is the feast day of the Fisher Saint. This powerful figure is portrayed as a woman haloed by twin suns, holding a dog. She is the patron of sufferers of mental illness, scriptwriters, and generals. The details of this saint’s life have conflated with many legends, but most accounts agree that she drowned in moonlight at the end, and the world mourned her passing.”

- from The Hidden Almanac for 2016-12-28

“You know how they say that religion is the opiate of the masses? Well, I took masses of opiates religiously.”

Wishful Drinking, Carrie Fisher

May 09 2017





im a bad person who thinks bad thoughts like ‘ew what is that girl wearing’ and then remember that im supposed to be positive about all things and then think ‘no she can wear what she wants, fuck what other people say damn girl u look fabulous’ and im just a teeny bit hypocritical tbh

I was always taught by my mother, That the first thought that goes through your mind is what you have been conditioned to think. What you think next defines who you are.


Yep, that second comment is true

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40 Character Development Questions


Since I led off with a Character Development Checklist, I thought it might be nice to round it out with a Question Sheet, as well.

Also, can someone explain to me how the fuck I misspelled “Development” on that post title and didn’t notice? Don’t pull from drafts and edit at 4:00 am, kids.

Although, if that’s the worst mistake I made yesterday then I think I’m doing pretty good. 


  1. How/why was your character named? 
  2. If they have a nickname, how did it originate?
  3. How many languages can they speak? (and why)
  4. What is the extent of their education?
  5. Where do they live?
  6. How close are they to their family?
  7. Do they have pets? 
  8. Are all the characters name easy to understand, pronounce, and are mostly different from all the other names throughout the story?
  9. Is the cast of characters diverse and interesting?
  10. Do you have an acceptable mix of men/women and of different ethnicity in ratio of how large your cast is? If not, why not?


  1. What does your character look like?
  2. If they have scars/tattoos, what is the origin?
  3. What is their most physically distinguishing characteristic?
  4. How similar do they look compared to their family members?
  5. Are all the characters different physically?


  1. What is their motive? 
  2. What is something about them that can surprise me (the writer)?
  3. On what occasion does this character lie?
  4. What is their greatest regret?
  5. What is their greatest fear?
  6. What is their worst vice?
  7. What is a talent they would like to have?
  8. Did they have a happy childhood? (why/why not?)
  9. What was the best thing that ever happened to them?
  10. What is their worst tic/habit?
  11. Who is the person they love the most?
  12. Who is the person who they hate the most?
  13. What is the state of their house? Clean? Messy? Run down? Perfect and stately?
  14. Are they superstitious? Why/why not? 
  15. How easy are they to get along with?


  1. How is this character different than all the other characters? 
  2. What would happen if your character had more information about the plot you’ve created?
  3. What would happen if your character had less information about the plot you’ve created?
  4. What has brought this character to this point in time?
  5. What is motivating your character in the plot so far? And do you expect this to change?
  6. How happy is your character with the way things are going?
  7. How has your character changed throughout the novel? Or, how do you plan on it changing?
  8. How are the goals changing for your character?
  9. Why is the story happening to this character and not someone else? 
  10. How can I make my character more likeable/unlikable, depending on the reaction I want?


There was a theory going around a few years back that the Hogwarts Houses are influenced by which Element someone is - Fire, Earth, Air, or Water. If you’re up to it, reblog this with your House and Astrological Sign, to compare how often it ends up right. It’s incredibly interesting to me.

GRYFFINDOR: The Fire Signs - Leo, Aries, & Sagittarius

HUFFLEPUF: The Earth Signs - Taurus, Virgo, & Capricorn

RAVENCLAW: The Air Signs - Gemini, Libra, & Aquarius

SLYTHERIN: The Water Signs - Scorpio, Cancer, & Pisces

May 07 2017

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When Doctors Discriminate




THE first time it was an ear, nose and throat doctor. I had an emergency visit for an ear infection, which was causing a level of pain I hadn’t experienced since giving birth. He looked at the list of drugs I was taking for my bipolar disorder and closed my chart.

“I don’t feel comfortable prescribing anything,” he said. “Not with everything else you’re on.” He said it was probably safe to take Tylenol and politely but firmly indicated it was time for me to go. The next day my eardrum ruptured and I was left with minor but permanent hearing loss.

Another time I was lying on the examining table when a gastroenterologist I was seeing for the first time looked at my list of drugs and shook her finger in my face. “You better get yourself together psychologically,” she said, “or your stomach is never going to get any better.”

If you met me, you’d never know I was mentally ill. In fact, I’ve gone through most of my adult life without anyone ever knowing — except when I’ve had to reveal it to a doctor. And that revelation changes everything. It wipes clean the rest of my résumé, my education, my accomplishments, reduces me to a diagnosis.

I was surprised when, after one of these run-ins, my psychopharmacologist said this sort of behavior was all too common. At least 14 studies have shown that patients with a serious mental illness receive worse medical care than “normal” people. Last year the World Health Organization called the stigma and discrimination endured by people with mental health conditions “a hidden human rights emergency.”

I never knew it until I started poking around, but this particular kind of discriminatory doctoring has a name. It’s called “diagnostic overshadowing.”

According to a review of studies done by the Institute of Psychiatry at King’s College, London, it happens a lot. As a result, people with a serious mental illness — including bipolar disorder, major depression, schizophrenia and schizoaffective disorder — end up with wrong diagnoses and are under-treated.

That is a problem, because if you are given one of these diagnoses you probably also suffer from one or more chronic physical conditions: though no one quite knows why, migraines, irritable bowel syndrome and mitral valve prolapse often go hand in hand with bipolar disorder.

Less mysterious is the weight gain associated with most of the drugs used to treat bipolar disorder and schizophrenia, which can easily snowball into diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol and cardiovascular disease. The drugs can also sedate you into a state of zombiedom, which can make going to the gym — or even getting off your couch — virtually impossible.

It’s little wonder that many people with a serious mental illness don’t seek medical attention when they need it. As a result, many of us end up in emergency rooms — where doctors, confronted with an endless stream of drug addicts who come to their door looking for an easy fix — are often all too willing to equate mental illness with drug-seeking behavior and refuse to prescribe pain medication.

I should know: a few years ago I had a persistent migraine, and after weeks trying to get an appointment with any of the handful of headache specialists in New York City, I broke down and went to the E.R. My husband filled out paperwork and gave the nurse my list of drugs. The doctors finally agreed to give me something stronger than what my psychopharmacologist could prescribe for the pain and hooked me up to an IV.

I lay there for hours wearing sunglasses to block out the fluorescent light, waiting for the pain relievers to kick in. But the headache continued. “They gave you saline and electrolytes,” my psychopharmacologist said later. “Welcome to being bipolar.”

When I finally saw the specialist two weeks later (during which time my symptoms included numbness and muscle weakness), she accused me of being “a serious cocaine user” (I don’t touch the stuff) and of displaying symptoms of “la belle indifference,” a 19th-century term for a kind of hysteria in which the patient converts emotional symptoms into physical ones — i.e., it was all in my head.

Indeed, given my experience over the last two decades, I shouldn’t have been surprised by the statistics I found in the exhaustive report “Morbidity and Mortality in People with Serious Mental Illness,” a review of studies published in 2006 that provides an overview of recommendations and general call to arms by the National Association of State Mental Health Program Directors. The take-away: people who suffer from a serious mental illness and use the public health care system die 25 years earlier than those without one.

True, suicide is a big factor, accounting for 30 to 40 percent of early deaths. But 60 percent die of preventable or treatable conditions. First on the list is, unsurprisingly, cardiovascular disease. Two studies showed that patients with both a mental illness and a cardiovascular condition received about half the number of follow-up interventions, like bypass surgery or cardiac catheterization, after having a heart attack than did the “normal” cardiac patients.

The report also contains a list of policy recommendations, including designating patients with serious mental illnesses as a high-priority population; coordinating and integrating mental and physical health care for such people; education for health care workers and patients; and a quality-improvement process that supports increased access to physical health care and ensures appropriate prevention, screening and treatment services.

Such changes, if implemented, might make a real difference. And after seven years of no change, signs of movement are popping up, particularly among academic programs aimed at increasing awareness of mental health issues. Several major medical schools now have programs in the medical humanities, an emerging field that draws on diverse disciplines including the visual arts, humanities, music and science to make medical students think differently about their patients. And Johns Hopkins offers a doctor of public health with a specialization in mental health.

Perhaps the most notable of these efforts — and so far the only one of its kind — is the narrative medicine program at Columbia University Medical Center, which starts with the premise that there is a disconnect between health care and patients and that health care workers need to start listening to what their patients are telling them, and not just looking at what’s written on their charts.

According to the program’s mission statement, “The effective practice of health care requires the ability to recognize, absorb, interpret, and act on the stories and plights of others. Medicine practiced with narrative competence is a model for humane and effective medical practice.”

We can only hope that humanizing programs like this one become a requirement for all health care workers. Maybe then “first, do no harm” will apply to everyone, even the mentally ill.

By JULIANN GAREY Published: August 10, 2013

The author of the novel “Too Bright to Hear Too Loud to See” and a co-editor of “Voices of Bipolar Disorder: The Healing Companion.”

Reblogging because this is the sort of thing that needs signal boosting the heck out of it. Probably many of the people who see this in my Tumblr are people who already know from first-hand experience as a patient. Probably most of the people who even know my Tumblr exists are not in a position to perpetuate this problem (because they aren’t doctors).  But I figure if more people get info like this circulating, maybe eventually someone in a better position to reach more doctors with this kind of information and open serious dialogue about how to address the problem will come across this.

Until then, at least a better informed patient population can, I hope, be in a better position to advocate for themselves—if not always as individuals then perhaps as groups.

As an older woman (I’m 40, verging on middle aged, OH MY GOD), I can so relate to this, especially with the fact I’ve gained a lot of weight on my anti-depressants and while they’re really helping in some ways my doctor is super unhappy because now I’ve got high blood pressure. I actually started gaining weight again with a new hormonal birth control and thank the good lord above my doctor is a really great person and he finally just said screw all this, you aren’t allowed BC any more, we’re testing your thyroid and fuck this nonsense because you’re going on bp meds for your health and if you lose weight fantastic but you’re not going to die of a stroke or a pulmonary embolism while we’re waiting to see what happens next because I’m supposed to lecture you about diet and exercise first. 

Find a doctor who gets this, if you at all can. Find someone who listens to you. That was the longest dr appointment I’ve had in years and frankly, this guy, who might be on the young side of 30, is trying to give me the best life he knows how. 

Reblog if you 100% okay with a transgender person correcting you if you accidentally misgender them or use their dead name.

The Rainbow Railroad is helping gay men escape Chechen concentration camps. They need our help.



“Rainbow Railroad receives hundreds of requests for help every year from countries where LGBT individuals are open targets of violence.

Because the volume of requests is so high, we focus our efforts on assisting LGBT people who have faced physical violence or face an imminent threat of violence, imprisonment, or death.

We have been successful in helping individuals from the Caribbean, Africa and Middle East where we have local networks to support and validate cases.”


“The costs range as every case is unique. Sometimes the individual has the resources to help themselves and they just need information and support from us to make a move.  In these cases, the cost to Rainbow Railroad is staff and volunteer time to research and provide information.  In cases where they need financial support to get to safety, it costs about $5000 to cover flights and other related costs.”

You can donate at the following link: https://www.rainbowrailroad.ca/donate

If you can’t donate, please reblog/like to signal boost!

May 05 2017



Author: paintedrecs

Summary: “Oh,” Stiles said, his voice coming out low and breathy, “fuck me.”

“I don’t think that’s on the syllabus, but we can check to see if there’s a spot open in any of his classes,” Scott said, grinning.

“This isn’t an actual professor, though,” Stiles insisted, unable to resist brushing his thumb over the sharp line of the man’s bearded jaw. He was laughing at something off-camera, the shot taken in three-quarters view, his coat collar casually rumpled and opened to reveal a sliver of a simple grey t-shirt. The whole thing was deliberately calculated to lend him a more accessible feel, and god help him, Stiles was falling for it.


When Stiles signed up for Dr. Hale’s intro to history class, he had two goals: knock out the credits his advisor was bugging him to complete before he graduated, and spend a few hours a week daydreaming about his sexy professor’s salt and pepper beard.

Derek, a few months away from turning forty and not sure when his life had started feeling so damn lonely, had never encountered someone like Stiles before. Bright-eyed, sharp-tongued, determined to throw Derek’s carefully cultivated world into disarray…and absolutely the last person Derek should be falling in love with.

Info: 204k | Mature | Teacher/Student AU, Age difference, Slow build

Notes: I know, I know, 204k???? Probably the biggest Sterek fic I’ve ever read but, believe me, it’s so worth it! It has some of my favorite tropes, like a teacher/student relationship (not really tbh but you’ll have to read it to find out) and a super slow but super goooooood build up. Also really loved how they communicated with each other <3  -C

Sneak Peek:

Dr. Hale chuckled, not seeming phased by Stiles’s nervous chatter. “I prefer keeping the lights on.”

His voice was smooth and softer than Stiles had been expecting. Throughout the majority of the summer, he’d been imagining—possibly at night, with his bedroom door locked and the ripped-out catalog page nearby—a gruffer, deeper tone, something dark and demanding to match the rough scrape of a beard against his skin, the grip of strong hands holding him down.

The fantasy version had been…undeniably appealing, but there was something magnetic about the man sitting next to him, like the world had shifted into a new dimension without him noticing, one where the colors were just the tiniest bit brighter.

Oh no, he thought, remembering a flash of brilliant red hair in third grade and the eight years it’d taken to start seeing Lydia as a real person—who was never going to date him—instead of the ideal he’d set up on a pedestal and dedicated himself to worshipping.

Dr. Hale turned those eyes away from the door and back on him, and Stiles could only summon, Oh well; too late, before his new ideal was speaking again.

pick-me-ups for writers


for the self-conscious beginner: No one makes great things until the world intimately knows their mediocrity. Don’t think of your writing as terrible; think of it as preparing to contribute something great.

for the self-conscious late bloomer: Look at old writing as how far you’ve come. You can’t get to where you are today without covering all that past ground. For that, be proud.

for the perfectionist: Think about how much you complain about things you love—the mistakes and retcons in all your favorite series—and how you still love them anyway. Give yourself that same space.

for the realist: There will be people who hate your story even if it’s considered a classic. But there will be people who love your story, even if it is strange and unpopular.

for the fanfic writer: Your work isn’t lesser for not following canon. When you write, you’ve created a new work on its own. It can be, but does not have to be, limited by the source material. Canon is not the end-all, be-all. 

for the writer’s blocked: It doesn’t need to be perfect. Sometimes you have to move on and commit a few writing sins if it means you can create better things out of it.

for the lost: You started writing for a reason; remember that reason. It’s ok to move on. You are more than your writing. It will be here if you want to come back.

May 04 2017

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Have a baby Pygmy Hippo taking a bath just in case you are having a bad day.

You’re welcome.




@tomstinkerbell, @violetsaffron73

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[Drawing of a pink and white penguin holding a purple flower and saying “May this month be everything you want it to be.” in a blue speech bubble.]

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